But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
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