nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
