yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
