I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Randomize
