So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
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so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
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can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
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