How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
