Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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