very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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