You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Randomize
