You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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