butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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