threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
