Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
You smell like stripper and shame
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
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i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
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