Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
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