in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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