my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
we should paint friendship bongs
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