He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize
