I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize