Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
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