Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
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