pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
You are the jesus of drinking
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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