im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
birth control should be required to get into college
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Randomize
