and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
