I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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