The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I just got carded by a ten year old.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
