We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
