I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
So vagazzling was a success
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
