I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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