We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize