so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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