we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
