Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
