They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
