dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Randomize
