I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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