hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
