I want to have your abortion
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
