try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
