dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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