Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
