The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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