Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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