i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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