i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
