i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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