Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
