i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
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