I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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