Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
