she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
