How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize