Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
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